...a snip it from my mind...

My husband has his grandfather's kitchen table and buffet. He's has it in storage for years. He finally decided to get rid of it, so he packed it all up and hauled it to a furniture consignment shop. The owner of the shop cleaned the hell out of this furniture. It didn't even look the like the same stuff. It was amazing. So the furniture sat in the shop for 3 plus months and didn't sell, so we brought it home and stashed it in the garage until we could figure out what to do with it.

This furniture is really pretty. The buffet is in good shape, but the table is fragile. I mean, it's a hundred years old and it wasn't the sturdiest table to begin with. So anyway, we completely fell in love with the polished up pieces and shortly after getting the Christmas decorations down, we decided to re-arrange the front room so we could accommodate it. The plan was that we would get rid of the book case and move the couch to where the book case was. We'd set the table under the front window and keep a picture puzzle on it all the time. The buffet would replace the hutch.

I emptied the dang-blasted six-foot book case (that was packed to full capacity) and hutch (where I kept everything that I didn't know where to keep), hauled the "old" stuff to the garage, swept, moped and dusted, then we hauled the "new" stuff in. It didn't fit. Not even close. I mean, we measured everything before we moved it, and it fit, but it didn't "fit"...know what I mean? The wood was too dark, the table stuck out into the room too far, the balance was all wrong...it just didn't work. It looked like crap.

We hemmed and hawed and bickered, then hauled the "new" stuff BACK into the garage and the "old" stuff BACK inside. I busted my butt all afternoon, cleaning and moving and I have nothing to show for it. We did end up moving the couch and the chairs around a little bit, so it does look different, but it isn't what I expected. And those dust monsters that resided under the couch have been evicted. And my floors are moped. And my hutch and bookcase are clean. Aside from that...

But let me tell you something, people. I scored BIG brownie points. How many women would re-arrange her main room (which is 1/3 of my entire house) to accommodate her husband's grandfather's cheap, old furniture? Unfortunately, these days, my brownie points are worth about as much as a Zimbabwe dollar. (For those of you who may not know, earlier this week Zimbabwe released a new 50 BILLION dollar note--it's worth $1.25USD.)

Meanwhile, I have a substantial pile of "stuff" next to my bed that needs a home.

Where does all this "stuff" come from? And why do I have so much of it? I just don't know what to do with it! Do I keep it, do I throw it out? What if I throw it away, but then find out that I need it?

Side A: NO! No. I don't need it. "When in doubt, throw it out!" That's what I always say! Why do I need a 10-year-old map of Washington DC? If I go to Washington DC, I'll get a new map. Dang-blasted things are free for crying out loud.

Side B: But it's a souvenir from our two-week, cross country road trip. I could put it in a scrap book along with the 8 rolls of 36-exposure film that we got double prints of. And those pictures are stored in those boxes along with every other picture I ever took over the last 14 years.

Side A: Okay, then fine...keep the map. But what the hell are you going to DO with it?!?!

Side B: You're right. I'll throw it away.

Side A: NO! WAIT--you could decoupage the back of that bookcase with it!

Scared Stiff

I work in a suite (office) with only one other woman. The suite (office) across the hall from us is also very small (4 people at maximum capacity, but throughout the day to share food, borrow coffee creamer, or just to chat--whatever. So, late Friday afternoon, my friend Sharon comes into the suite. I can't see the door to my suite from my office, but I know it's her because no one ever comes into our office except the girls across the hall. When I sit at my desk, there is a very large window into the suite on my left and a window to the outside on my right. So I don't get up from my seat, but I turn to look out my window into the suite. Sharon is standing RIGHT at the window wearing a stupid paper old-lady mask.

Now folks, let me tell you, I was all arms, legs, and lungs. You'd have thought someone plugged my ass in. She scared me so badly that I screamed so loud, that I scared her so badly, that she screamed. Then I started laughing. We laughed until we cried. When it was all over and our heart rates returned to normal, I congratulated her with a, "THAT WAS AWESOME!!!"

That incident is definitely rated in the top 5 of my all time greatest scares. My only regret is that we didn't catch it on video.

Happy New Year!

Psst...is it over yet? Whew--that was a close one! There for a while, I wasn't sure I was going to make it out live. On one hand, it seems like October was just yesterday. On the other hand, it feels like two years has past (at warp speed) since October.I'm just glad it's over. Don't get me wrong--it was fun. Crazy, but fun.


And now it's January 2009. I'm ready for 2009. I only have one new year's resolution: "Be happy."

That's the short answer. The long version includes:
I am going to be a better wife and mother.
I'm going to get in shape (I only gained 3 pounds over the holidays!) and I'm taking my daughter with me (she needs to get in shape, too). And we're going to have fun doing it.
I'm going to give more (time and talent as well as money) to charity.
I'm going to go to church regularly.

And I'm going to learn Fair Isle.

I have a pair of socks I need to finish (the ones I started in October). I stepped on the bag and broke the needles. I ordered more needles and got word that they shipped today. Aside from that, the only project I have going right now is a dress-up shawl for my daughter and a victory scarf for my sister (she deployed today with Air Force).

So...wish me luck and I'll keep you posted.

OMG--speaking of keeping you posted...I need to update you on the child whose mother was in jail. Mom got out of jail. I met her just after Thanksgiving. She gave me a HUGE hug, looked me in the eye and said, "I can't thank you enough for taking care of my baby while I was gone. She talked about you every time she came to visit and I just can't tell you how much you meant to her." I told her it was no problem, that her daughter, "...is a delightful child and we enjoy having her." This child has been to our house several times over the last month and I've chatted with her mother on as many occasions. I still have not gotten up the courage to ask about her rap sheet. Until I do, that child will have to play at my house.

Holiday Fun

OMG--has it really been 7 weeks since I posted? Wow...


I think you knew I went to Phoenix for business. I left late Sunday afternoon. Monday morning my dad called. My aunt (who lives in Denver) is dying and my mom and dad are coming to Denver. Can they stay with me. "Sure!" I tell him, "Except that I'm in Phoenix." I owe my husband BIG time for that one. Not only did he host my folks while I was gone, but he had to give them our bed because our spare bed furniture was in the garage. I got back to Denver Friday night and my folks were around through the weekend. It is always so good to have them. I just love it.


November just flew by. I don't know what happened to November. I do know that Thanksgiving Day was a pajama day at my house. We watched movies and napped and ate turkey all day. It was GREAT! So great, in fact, that we stayed in our pajamas practically all weekend. And like icing on the cake, the weather was even crappy, so I didn't feel guilty about it!


So December is almost gone. My co-worker just hollered "Christmas is NEXT WEEK!" I choked on my tea. I always think I'm ready, but I'm never really ready.


Saturday was the carriage parade in Parker. It was an incredibly beautiful day with highs near 60, so I planned to take my daughter. I called V's mom and asked if V could come with us. Meanwhile D came over to play, then L. They both wanted to go, too! How do I get myself into these situations?


Oh well--we got an excellent, sunny spot to watch the parade with the wind at our backs...POI-FECT! Only I soon realized it was maybe too perfect...like not-even-on-the-parade-route-perfect.

So we moved to a spot in front of the speakers. While we waited for the parade to start, the girls entertained themselves (and all those around us) by dancing jigs...

The parade was full of horses of all shapes and sizes, but our favorite were the miniatures. This little fella's name is "Tiny". We love "Tiny" so much, in fact, that we got into a fight over who "called" Tiny first.

And then there was "Buster". Buster is anything but tiny! Can you see that Buster has antlers on his head?
Well, of course he wore antlers...he was pulling none other than the big guy himself! The girls were SO excited because, "Did you see that? Mrs. Clause WAVED to ME!" "I know, I know" another one screamed, "She waved to ME, TOO!"

I agreed to treat the girls to ice cream, so on our way to the ice cream parlor, we found a saddle and a step stool next to the horse statue. How could I say no?? Each girl got to climb aboard for her picture. This little one is mine.

And then we stopped to pet the reindeer.

By the time we got ice cream, I was totally over it all. The girls wined and complained the whole time, "How come I got my ice cream last?" "Why does M get to hold your hand?" "I wanted to sit on the top step!" "How come SHE got a bowl and a spoon?" Over and over and over they cried, "That's not fair!"

I always say "I'm never doing THAT again!" But I will. I always do.

Miscellaneous

(Deep sigh) Is it Friday yet?

Saturday was cold and wet in Denver. So was Sunday. And Monday. Tuesday started out nice enough (cold, but sunny), but now it's yucky again. This weather just makes me want to curl up in a soft, dark, quiet place.

I've been testing out some lace patterns. I think I mentioned that I found a website that suggested I begin knitting lace washcloths. The first one was feather and fan and it turned out nicely. Well, except for the fact that three quarters of the way through, I knit one row twice and it reversed the pattern. It still looks nice and really--it's a washcloth.

Based on my success at the feather and fan, I opted to skip "level two" and dive into the snowflake pattern. I knit the 5th row six times before I got it right. I'm still only 10 rows into it, but I'm not sure I like it. I figure I need to repeat at least three times before I judge.

Meanwhile, I dropped by the library last night and picked up a book about lace, one about cables (hats and scarves), one about knitting two socks at a time, and a couple cookbooks.

I'm still dieting. It sucks, but it's working. I topped out at 184 at the end of August and have managed to whittle myself down to 172. It has not been easy--under any stretch of the imagination. I get up at 4:45AM so I can workout for 40 minutes before work. In case any of you were wondering...it is REALLY dark at 4:45AM...and cold. Cold and dark.

I've started eating more whole grains. More specifically, flax seed meal. I add it to my oatmeal and it's dee-lish! It says you can use it to replace eggs in recipes. I decided to try it out last weekend by replacing one of the three eggs in a muffin recipe. I soaked the flax meal as instructed, then cracked the other two eggs into the batter, then realized that the recipe only called for two eggs. Oh well--we'll try again this weekend.

I also bought some wheat germ and wheat bulgur. You're supposed to be able to replace 25% of flour in a recipe with wheat germ. That's why I bought it, but I haven't tried it yet. My dad used to put wheat germ on damn-near everything he ate. It tastes great on cold cereal, yogurt, peanut butter sandwiches, blah, blah, blah. As for the bulgur--It's one of the main ingredients in the cabbage rolls I'm making for dinner tonight. Don't tell my husband.

FOs and WIPs

Okay--the fact that I started these in April, I think, only makes this FO that much sweeter. I just finished these beauties on Monday. I'm not sure if they fit my daughter's feet anymore, but I wasn't ambitious enough to make them any larger than I did. Behold my first ever pair of socks! I also crocheted a hat and blanket for my stepson's mother, who is expecting a baby in November. I started this project in August and finished it the day of the baby shower (September 13).

And I crocheted this hat in August for the baby's Christmas gift--matching boots to follow.
This furry stuff on the hat was a joke. I couldn't see squat, so I just kinda made it up and put "stitches" where I thought they should be. To the non-crocheter/knitter, it looks fantastic. People who know...know it's jacked up. Fortunately, I'm a "good enough" kind of person and I think it's great.

I'm working on this scarf for my daughter. I think it's too wide, but am not bothered by it enough to rip it out. I think it will be just fine. I also expect to make her a hat to match.

Meanwhile, I'm working on the traveling scarves as they arrive. I have to say, these scarves are starting to look pretty crazy! It's getting more and more challenging to find colors to "match".

I expect to cast on a pair of socks for my mother, but am nervous about getting them finished in time for Christmas. At the speed I knit, I'll be lucky to get those socks finished by Christmas 2009. So I thought maybe I'd knit her a lacy shawl instead. Based on the reaction this statement has gotten from some experienced knitters, that ain't gonna happen either.

I'm slow and I'm really very green (meaning inexperienced). The only thing I have going for me is that I'm fearless...and I'm a "good enough" kind of person. I don't care if I screw up, it's not like anything will be ruined...Just take it out, right? What could go wrong? But my mom is a life-long knitter, so I want her gift to be perfect. I think I can do it. I've got 2 and a half months...I think I can do it.

Please Advise

My daughter has become good friends with a child we’ll call A. A is delightful, well mannered little girl with a vivid imagination. She is well dressed, clean, and healthy little girl. On Sunday, we took this child on a hike with us. Her father sent her over with a hoodie (in case it got cold), a bottle of water, an apple, and a banana all carefully placed in a backpack. A also handed me a piece of paper with her father’s cell phone number, “in case of an emergency.”

Sounds responsible, yes? I certainly thought so. Which is why I was so surprised to hear my daughter’s answer to my question, “Are A’s mother and father home?” My daughter tells me that A “…doesn’t have a mother. Her mother is in jail.”

WTF?!? JAIL??? “What (in my head: in the *$@%*&$@ name of all that is good and holy) is her mother in jail for? My daughter tells me she doesn’t know, “She (A) doesn’t like to talk about it because it makes her sad.”

Wow. My daughter’s friend’s mother is in jail. That makes me uncomfortable.

Fast forward two days. I’m walking my daughter to school this morning and she says, “A is excited because her brother got out of jail yesterday.”

I screamed so loud, only the dogs could hear it: BROTHER????? Then in a normal tone I say to my child, “I didn’t know A had a brother.” My child tells me, “Yup…and he just got out of jail.” Then, before I could regain my senses, she continues, “You know what is weird?” I’m thinking I could write a book on weird right now, but decide to humor her. “What’s weird?” She tells me, “A’s mom is in jail and J’s (I haven’t met “J”, but apparently he is A’s next door neighbor.) dad is in jail.

O-M-G--WHAT KIND OF NEIGHBORHOOD AN I LIVING IN?!?!

Folks—I could go on about this for a really long time, but let’s cut to the chase…Do I have a right to know why A’s mom is in jail? Can I just walk down there and ask Dad, “Why is Mom in jail?” And what about Brother? I’m even more concerned about Brother because he’s OUT!” Is he living with them?

Help me. What do I say? What do I do?