I Give Up

Not really...it's an empty threat and anyone who knows me, knows it. It usually makes me feel better and its a good way for me to get my point across.

"What happened?" you ask. Dinner. That's what happened. I like to think that I'm a good cook. After all, I like my cooking (usually). The truth is, I'f good intentions counted, I'd be a mater chef. Unfortunatley, "the road to hell is paved with good intentions. "

I am a very adventurous eater. I'll eat damn near anything and I get excited about new foods. I love to mix flavors and often times get a tiny bit of everything from my plate onto my fork for each bite. I like sweet and hot and salty and cold and creamy and raw and cooked and grilled and smoked. I LOVE food. I love that the possibilities are endless.

My husband, on the other hand, is a meat and potatoes man. As far as seasonings go, if it's not salt, pepper, or brown gravy, it's "sauce" and he doesn't want his food "all sauced up!" After 11 years with him, I find myself in a cycle. I cook what he likes (fried chicken and pork, steaks, hamburgers, and lots and lots of potatoes and corn) for several weeks, then I get bored. I try to sneak foods in thinking that eventually he will see things my way and become a lover of all things "food". It never works. Even when I try to do it straight his way, I still manage to jack things up.

Last night was what I thought a "his" dinner night. I made pork chops, smothered in gravy served with baked potatoes and cheesy cauliflower. I sauteed some onion and garlic in olive oil, then added the pork chops to brown, then some chicken broth and flour. Simple enough, yes? No.

How was I to know that the garlic was industrial strength concentrate? There was no warning label on it. It's just a bulb of garlic. Recipe called for 4 cloves (settle down--I know the difference between a clove and a bulb). I thought that sounded a bit much for pork chops, so I only used two. Within minutes, my nose burned and my eyes watered...ah crap...I start trying to scoop it out. Five minutes later my husband yells from downstairs, "What the hell are you cooking in there...my god...are you trying to kill me?!" He was right. It was crazy. We opened the windows, the doors, and turned on fans trying to air the house out. And, of course, it's like 25 degrees outside, so now the house is like an ice box.

All he could say was, "What the hell would you put garlic on a pork chop for anyway?"

"Then YOU cook!" I tell him, "I give up!" I swore as I marched up stairs to read. I still don't know if he ate it.

Organic...Yea or Ney?

I read an article in the Denver Post back in July 2007 titled “Reasons you should buy regular goods” by Jackie Avner. What can I say? She’s got a good point. And I found numerous publications that support what she's saying.

I think the concept of keeping our foods free from chemicals is a good one. I don’t want to poison myself or my family by eating apples laced with some toxic bug killer. But I think this can best be accomplished if we buy local. I shop at the farmers market all summer and I LOVE pick-your-own farms! And if these local farmers are organic, that’s all the better. But I’m not going to spend 20% to 40% more for produce that’s been shipped in from all over the world just because it promises to be grown without chemicals.

I think the best option yet is to grow your own. I plan a garden every year, but last year my garden sucked (because I didn’t put forth enough effort). I’m ahead of the game this year. I got a book from the library that shows you how to compost in a plastic trash can (the big ones that you drag out to the curb every week for the truck). I’ve started browsing seed catalogs and am mapping out my plots. I’ll be starting some seedlings inside this year (we’ve tried this before and failed, but I’m learning).

So…what do you think? Do you buy organic foods? Do you grow your own? Do you think I’m an imbecile? Leme have it!

Work Stuff

During a conference call on Wednesday, I got word that we lost one of the two contracts I work on. It was a HUGE blow. I gasped out loud, felt faint, then thought I might vomit. I had to sit down. That million dollar contract was 40% of my job and now it’s gone. Gulp!

This wouldn’t be as devastating except that we’re currently writing the proposal for the other contract I work on. The contract that requires my company have an office in Colorado…yeah…that one. It’s out to bid this year, too.

I’m really…REALLY nervous. Regardless of how stellar an employee I might be, it doesn’t make sense for the company to keep me if we don’t have this contract. There are only two of us in Colorado and they have 200 in Arizona. The ONLY reason I'm here is because the contract requires it. I'm just a warm body.

My head hurts again and I think I’m going to throw up.

I know in my heart that no matter what happens, I’m going to land on my feet. If I loose my job, it’s because there is something better out there for me. It’s just that the unknown is scary to me. I need structure…and routine…I need an aspirin…and a drink...I need to update my resume! It is going to be weeks--maybe months before I find out what happens.

Hey, who knows…maybe I’m destined to home school Ruth’s kid! Ha Ha Ha

St. Anthony to the Rescue!

A special thanks to my new BFF, Saint Anthony, for helping me find the Girl Scout cookie order form. And thanks to all of you for sending me good thoughts. The form was safely tucked into the pocket behind the passenger seat of the truck.

My daughter's goal is to sell 100 boxes and we have orders for 90 boxes so far. My husband took the order form to work yesterday and hung it up in the kitchen beside two other Girl Scout order forms. He's worked with some of those people for 10 years and he is the HR guy, so I expect he'll get a couple dozen orders despite the competition.

How many of you were sent here by Olga? Welcome! Thanks so much for stopping by. You're here at a good time. Guess what I learned how to do...



Whoops...let me try that again...

I learned how to knit AND I learned how to post pics!!! O happy day! Unfortunately, I'm still a crappy photographer. This is a picture of a garter stitch scarf made with a very fluffy baby alpaca. I can't be anymore specific than that because I seem to have misplaced the wrapper. Do you see a theme developing here: lost cookie order form...lost yarn wrapper...

That's all for today. Come back tomorrow for a healthy discussion of the pros and cons of organic food.

Lost

Saint Anthony, Saint Anthony,
please come around.
Something's lost
and can't be found!

I lost my daughter's Girl Scout cookie order form. Poof! Vanished. Here I've been freaking out for weeks about having to collect orders for 100 boxes of cookies. We go out ONCE and collect orders for 50 boxes. Who knew my neighborhood was a Girl Scout cookie order gold mine? I collect the orders, then I loose the form. I lost the flippin' form!!!

My husband is unable to pass up an opportunity to kick me when I'm down. As I'm tossing the house for the sixth or seventh time mumbling, "Where the hell IS it?" He says, "You know...if you'd just put things where they belong..."

I was actually pretty proud at my lightening-fast comeback. "You know what? You are absolutely right. In fact, as soon as I find this form, I'm going put YOU in charge of Girl Scout cookies."

I even went to the public library last night to ask if we dropped the form in the book return. I called the last person who ordered to ask if we left the form at her house. I spoke to the Cookie Mom to ask if someone had contacted her about it (since her contact information is on the form). Nothing. I reckon the cat ate it.

Don't you know that as soon as I finish explaining to my neighbors that I lost the form, I'll find it

Meanwhile, if you see Saint Anthony (the patron saint of lost articles), tell him I need some help.

Whole Foods

Ah yes…the grocery mecca for all that is organic. I’m not much of an organic person for a few reasons, none of which we’ll get into today. Remind me sometime and I’ll tell you why, but today, I speak of my experience at Whole Foods.

Overall my experience on Tuesday was very good. I was pleasantly surprised that, in general, the food there is not THAT much more expensive than what I buy at Safeway. What really surprised me was the amount of food they sell in bulk. And it’s SO CHEAP! They had a whole isle of different kinds grains (rice, bulgur, couscous, oats, and pastas), flours, sugars, honey, syrup, fresh-ground nut butters (peanut and almond), trial mixes, and dried fruits! I was in utter awe. It was beautiful. Like I said in the beginning, I’m not an “Organic” person, but I do consider myself “Green” and the idea of reducing packaging AND saving money has me all excited. I can’t wait to go back!

My co-worker (actually, she’s my boss, but she was my co-worker for 2 years before she became my boss and I prefer to think of her as a co-worker) has been put on a low sodium diet (this woman has more health issues than the boy in the bubble). Her restricted diet has encouraged me to re-think the amount of sodium I consume, as well. I am dumbfounded by the amount of sodium that is in our food. Consider this, her diet restricts her to 1500mg a day. Now go to your pantry and look at the labels on your pre-packaged food. One can of Campbell’s chicken noodle soup has more than 1800 mg of sodium (890 mg per serving times two and a half servings per can). In fact, it’s so ridiculous, that the FDA is thinking about regulating it. This, again, is a story for another day.

Back to Whole Foods…they sell veggie chips. They are made with carrots, spinach, and potatoes and have half the fat of regular potato chips. Being the curious sole that I am, I bought some for my daughter.

Day one: Daughter LOVES the “rainbow” chips. Score one for Mom. Yeah, my kid eats spinach chips…and she likes them.

Day two: Daughter reports that “The green chips taste like cat litter.” I quickly poo-poo her metaphor with, “Oh yeah? Well, how do you know what cat litter tastes like?” She responds with, “Once…”

WHAT?!??! NO WAY! Sweet Jesus, please…I beg of you…In the name of everything that is good and holy--do NOT let this child tell me that she has tasted cat litter. Mother Mary, Dear God, NO! Tell me she didn’t…

Daughter continues, “Once, after Dad cleaned the litter box, I fell and a little bit got in my mouth.”

For the next 90 seconds we just stare at each other. She's smiling weakly. I'm expressionless.

I finally muster up the courage to continue with, “So…did you get to play outside today?”


Yeah…my kid eats cat litter…what of it?

Diet Update (includes recipe!)

I don’t own a scale, at least not one that’s reliable, so I don’t know how much weight I lost, or even if I’ve lost any. But I have been a champ about sticking to the eating part of my diet. The exercise part has been a little more difficult to squeeze in, but I’m definitely eating “low fat”. I have not gone to the gym yet this week, but I HAVE gotten up early every day and done my leg exercises.

I have chondromalacia patella. Don’t worry, it’s not contagious. My kneecap doesn’t line up properly so the cartilage under my kneecaps is wearing out more quickly than what is “normal”. It is very painful and I like to describe it as “crunchy knees” because my knees crackle, pop, and grind whenever I bend them.

I went to a specialist back in May and had it officially diagnosed, then I attended a couple months of physical therapy. The physical therapy worked GREAT! Seriously. I started running 5 days a week and was loving it. Then it got dark in the mornings so I quit running. Then it got cold in the mornings and I quit getting up early to do my leg exercises. Then my knees started hurting.

I really expect to get on a gym schedule next week. You’re thinking, “Blah, blah, blah” but I can’t go tonight because my daughter has religious education class at 6 and tomorrow night we have Brownie Scouts at 6:30 and PTO meeting at 7.

So for dinner last night I had cranberry bulgur stuffed peppers. It was DE-lish and SO easy to make. Let’s see if I can remember…

In a skillet, mix 14 oz of chicken broth with 1/2 cup of chopped carrots and 1/4 cup of chopped onion. Simmer for 5 minutes. Stir in 1/3 cup of dried cranberries and 3/4 cup of wheat bulgur (more about this a little later). Remove from heat, cover, and let sit for 5 minutes. Meanwhile, cut two bell peppers (I used red, but you can use any color) in half lengthwise so they will fit in the skillet, clean out seeds and set aside. Stir in 1/2 cup of shredded Muenster or mozz cheese (I used fat-free mozz) into the bulgur mixture. Fill peppers with bulgur mixture, put peppers in the skillet, add 1/2 cup of water and simmer until peppers are tender crisp.

About the wheat bulgur…it looks like brown couscous. It has a bit of a chewy texture and a nut-like flavor. It’s almost impossible to find it in a regular grocery store, but can usually be bought in bulk at your local organic grocery store—like a Whole Foods. In fact, I went to Whole Foods yesterday specially to purchase the bulgur. This trip to Whole Foods was a real experience for me…one that I’ll share with you tomorrow!

I got it!

I got it. It was a very unpleasant experience, but I got a brand-spanking new, fire engine red, 5-door (hatchback) Chevy Aveo. It's the cutest little thing you ever did see! I've only put 16 miles on it and I already love it. My daughter named it, "Lil Red" and she had her trademark finger prints smeared all over the back window before we even got off the lot.

It took THREE and a half OW-ERRRS (hours) to purchase this car. I went to the dealership straight from the office and didn't leave until 9 PM. I still can't decide if I was more hungry or more angry. This silly man was trying to sell me these extended warranties. I kept saying, "No thank you...Nope...No thanks…don't want it...NO warranties. I don't need it…No…Not interested…No." Finally I leaned across the desk and said, "It's a ten thousand dollar car…if it breaks, I'll throw it away and I'll buy a new one. I don't want your warranties. I'm hungry, I'm tired, and what I want, is to go HOME!"

Do any of these people recognize the irony in these warranties? I'm trying to buy a brand new car and you're asking me to pay for repairs "just in case" it breaks! It's a BRAND NEW CAR!!

I do have to say that I got a screaming good deal on the car. I had to fight like Braveheart to get it, but I got it! Those poor bastards made more money off my daughter with their stupid vending machines than they made off me buying that car!

The good news is that I won't have to go through that again for at least 3 years (that's when the warranty runs out and the car crumbles to dust).

Whadid I do?

Hunker down, folks…it’s going to be a very L-O-N-G year.

I got an email yesterday about Barrak Obama. The email warned me that Obama is a closet Muslim and that if he gets elected president, the terrorists will have control of the United States. The email says that the claims contained within had been confirmed by Snoops and it invites me to confirm the story myself.

So I did.

Turns out, the email is false (of course). It says the facts have been “…distorted and exaggerated…” I found the Snoops article fascinating on several levels.

I have to pause here and throw out my disclaimer. I am a registered Republican because my parents are Republican’s. Period. I don’t even know the difference between Republican’s and Democrats and I don’t care. I don’t think it matters (feel free to comment on this--correct me if I’m wrong). Whenever I vote, be it for the mayor, the sheriff, the council member, senator, or president, I vote for the candidate that I believe is best for the job, regardless of his or her party affiliation.

I am frustrated that our “system” makes it so hard for people to make informed decisions. The candidates are all full of shit. They all are telling us what they think we want to hear…what they think will win them the most votes. And then to be sure they get enough votes, they lie, distort, and exaggerate what the other guy did, does, said, says, believes, blah blah blah. The fanatic supporters even go as far as to try and scare me into believing that by voting for a Muslim candidate, I will give the terrorists control of my country.

Okay. Back to the email about Obama (who, by the way, is not Muslim)…after I read the Snoops article, I did a “reply to all” and said, it’s a lie, here’s the Snoops link.

I started war. This lady fires back (to “all”, of course) and says (among other things), that she is a college graduate and tells me that I insulted her intelligence. She says, “If Obama had a chance at my vote, your email reply just killed it.”

WTF? What did I do? What did I say? I appreciate that you haven't seen the actual emails, so I'll forward them to you if you want. I honestly don't understand how my email could have been more offensive than the first. All I did was say that Snoops reports that the claims made in the email are false and I included the link to the Snoops website.

Maybe I should move to Canada for the year or better yet, find some remote island in the South Pacific to take refuge. Until then, I reckon I best keep myself participating in political commentary (after this post, of course).

35 to go!

I started a diet on Sunday. It’s a delicate balance of Weight Watchers and Body-for-Life, with a heavy dose of common sense (eat less, exercise more). Wish me luck.

So far, the best part of my diet is the food. I know that sounds crazy, but I’m finally cooking for ME, not my husband. I get to eat things like lime pepper chicken breast with wild rice. Last night I made these incredibly delicious salmon and veggie packets. Tonight, I’m making prosciutto-wrapped shrimp grilled with bourbon BBQ sauce served with couscous and peas (I’m so excited!). These are low-fat recipes that I pulled out of a Better Homes and Garden cookbook and they take less than an hour to prepare!

And a good diet is worthless without some good ol’ exercise. (This is where the Body-for-Life part comes in to play.) I’ve committed myself to a schedule where I work out my upper body one day, lower body the next day, and do cardio the third day…lather, rinse, repeat. Only I started with cardio: a 3-mile jog (alone) plus a ½ mile stroll (with my daughter) and 20 minutes of jumping rope with my daughter (I almost died). That jumping rope Kicked. My. Ass. I couldn’t decide what would explode first: my lungs, my heart, or my knees.

Day two started with sore legs (I’m serious about jumping rope—YOU try it). I pushed through the pain and completed my lower body work out. Now…I didn’t do the same workout I had planned (that stupid plan was WAY too ambitious!), but I completed a (too) strenuous work out.

On day three, I could hardly walk. My legs hurt SO badly! What the hell? Having learned my lesson, I started my upper body workout with much more reasonable expectations (and lighter weights). I had a good workout. I’m a bit tender in some spots, but no pain (in my upper body).

Day four…I woke up in tears at 1 AM and, using only my arms, dragged my crippled ass to the bathroom for Aleve. I can barely walk, never mind the act of standing up and sitting down. Every time I do it, I sound like I’m giving birth. I’m walking around looking like I have a corn cob stuck up my ass. But I MUST do something and I’m scheduled for cardio. Maybe I could just sit in my chair and wave my arms frantically for 20 minutes.

What the hell? It’s not like I did leg presses with 50 pound weights or something. I only used 10 pounds! Oh well. I reckon I’ll know better next time.

My goal is to loose 10 pounds by my birthday (February 17--I accept cash and personal checks) and another 25 pounds by May 30. Wish me luck and I’ll keep you posted on my progress.

Bamboozled!

A couple nights ago, my daughter comes over to me and asks, “Do you want me to rub your feet?” “Hell yes I want you to rub my feet!” She rolls up her sleeves, takes off my slippers, and proceeds to rub my feet. After a few minutes she says, “Mom—this costs two quarters.” “I’ll give you two quarters, just keep rubbing.” Now, folks, this 6-year-old give a mean foot-rub. Seriously, she’s good! After about 5 minutes on each foot, she asks, “Do you want me to rub your shoulders?” Of course, I say, “Yes!” After a few minutes of this she says, “You need to lie down.” I don’t consider myself particularly savvy in the art of massage, but when your massage therapist (be her 6 or 60) tells you to lie down, lie down. My little girl starts gently pounding my back. It felt AWESOME!! Holy Crap! This kid is 6-years-old and she is giving me this kick-ass massage!

When it’s all over I say, “THAT was great! Instead of two quarters, I’m going to give you two DOLLARS!” She says to me, “No, Mom…your feet were two quarters. THAT cost FIVE dollars.”

Bamboozled by a first grader!

Meanwhile...I'm still working on those resolutions. Don't hold your breath.

Confessions of a Junkie

Hello. My name is Rachel and I am a picture puzzle junkie. It’s hard to say when my addiction started. I remember that the house I grew up in often had a picture puzzle being worked on the dinning room table (we ate in the kitchen). We’d dinker with it while chatting on the phone, or on a Sunday afternoon. I don’t remember that I was particularly drawn to the puzzles, but we all participated.

I didn’t work on picture puzzles anymore after I left home. I reckon it was for all the same reasons anyone stops doing picture puzzles, you either just don’t think to do it, or you don’t have space.

I bought my daughter her first puzzle when she was 3. She had been enjoying the puzzles so much at school that we picked up a couple 24-piece Winnie the Pooh puzzles for her birthday or something. She really enjoyed them and was good at it! This innocent past time for my 3-year-old inspired my girlfriend, Shari, to put out a puzzle in her home one year at Thanksgiving. What a great idea! Several of us picked away at it during the Thanksgiving party, then again during the football parties and finally finished it at the New Years Eve party (Shari is the Queen of Entertaining, be it 2 guests or 20, this girl can throw a party).

After we finished the first puzzle on New Year’s Eve, we cracked open another…then another…and another. I used to hang out at her house on Thursday nights. Shari and I would share a few cocktails and chat about our week as we hovered over a picture puzzle. Our children would entertain each other until late. I’m embarrassed to admit that my 4-year-old would come down stairs rubbing her eyes asking, “Momma…when are we going home?” “In a few minutes” I’d reply until Shari’s daughter would say, “Mom…it’s 11:00.”

I should have recognized the addiction the first time this happened.

Santa brought my husband a 1000 piece picture puzzle for Christmas this year. I had Christmas week off and he has this week off, so we thought it would be nice to have a puzzle in progress. My daughter’s diet for three days consisted of marshmallows, Cheetos, and Rice Krispies. She never even changed her clothes or brushed her hair, never mind taking a bath. My husband and I spent our waking moments bent over the table, our eyes bloodshot and brittle, our backs screaming for mercy, but we finished it! I snapped a picture of it before we crumpled it back into the box and spread out a new puzzle.

I was up at the crack of dawn on New Years Day, huddled over a steaming cup of coffee…and the picture puzzle. Now I sit at my desk after having been gone for 11 days and all I can think is, “I bet that bastard finished it!”

As for new year’s resolutions… I’m still developing my carefully laid-out plan of action. It has to be serious enough that I actually do it, but because I’m a mom, it has to also be flexible enough so as not to negatively impact the rest of my family. Frankly, I have no idea how I’m going to pull it off. I’m still working on it.